One of the things I asked to do for my birthday was to take a canoe trip down the Hillsborough River. We finally made it over to Canoe Escape today. Mr. Faulk was extremely nice and explained everything and the whole setup was efficient and easy. I wish I'd had some cash on me for a tip, because really, the whole thing was simple for us. Before going I read the Canoe Escape site and this review very carefully so I was pretty sure I knew how things would go (other than not thinking about tipping). What I didn't account for was it being spider season.

I'm really, really, really afraid of spiders. I've heard of people who are worse arachnophobics than I am. If there's a normal-sized non-hairy spider on the other side of the house or room I can deal with it in a "live and let live" sort of way. Put me anywhere near a fuzzy one or a largish one and I start heading towards hyperventilation and a week's worth of nightmares.

And when husband steers us directly into a tree and five very big long-jawed orb weavers fall on me? I have a bit of a panic attack. And when five minutes later we end up going the wrong way and almost backing into (did I mention another fear is not being able to see where I'm going?) into a little gator? I go into full blown panic attack. Like, hysterical fit full blown panic attack.

Once we got back going straight, it was okay, even with the occasional spider (spiders that can walk on water -- shudder!) and froggy hopping in the canoe. We're awful paddlers, though we didn't capsize despite running into a ton of logs/roots under the water and getting stuck on them. Towards the end we were getting the hang of backing and spinning, which was way helpful with not tossing me into trees full of spiders.

The only other downside is I have bruises on the sides of my legs from the canoe. Could be I was sitting wrong.

But it was insanely beautiful and there were tons of really cute turtles sunning themselves. I saw either an otter or gator swimming upstream right next to the boat with a water-plant cape (keeping me from identifying it). I wish we knew what we were doing enough to not constantly be focused on paddling instead of how pretty it was. But the water was just so gorgeous. And the canoing itself was really, really fun in those stretches that were straight and clear. As would have been the challenge of when it wasn't if it weren't for the spiders.

The trip ended at Morris Bridge Park where we had squirrels eating out of our hands while we waited for the shuttle back.

The other bit of weirdness for the day was when we were coming off the bus to go back to our car there was a police vehicle in the drive behind the shop where the bus dropped us off. We stopped to get the keys out of the backpack and the cop notices us (we'd been walking from the bus for maybe 20 feet that he didn't notice us), and snaps at us "Why are you sneaking up on me?" We thought he was kidding because, well, we'd been there and yelled our goodbyes and thank yous to the guide and so on. Hardly sneaking. But the look on his face was clearly not-kidding. He went on to ask us where we were from and what we were doing there (uh, it's a canoe rental shop and we went... get this... canoing??) and so on, and it was just really bizarre.

Anyway, I want to try it again someday. This time we'll know the route so that permanently lost feeling won't be there, and we will hopefully be able to avoid spider season and beginner paddling mistakes. Or maybe I'll find a place to lake paddle instead. But I definitely want to explore the parks along the route and that side of Tampa/Thonotosassa more, and definitely recommend Canoe Escape to any outdoorsy types or anyone who just wants to try something new. But not necessarily to the arachnophobics, not during spider season!